Find a marriage coach

You'll both need to trust this person, which makes the choice harder than hiring most coaches. Here's how to find one you can agree on.

Look for someone who works with couples, not just individuals. Coaching two people at once is its own skill. Ask how much of their work is with couples and how they run a session when both of you are in the room.

Ask how they stay neutral. If one of you feels the coach has picked a side, the coaching is over. Ask directly how they handle it, and notice on the intro call whether you both feel heard.

Match them to your situation. Constant arguing, drifting apart, recovering from an affair, and premarital coaching are different kinds of work. Pick a coach who names your situation without you prompting.

Ask about their training and beliefs. Some marriage coaches work from a faith background, some from a specific method, some from years of relationship work. None of these is wrong, but you should both be comfortable with it.

Have a short intro call together. Take turns describing what's going on and listen to how the coach responds to each of you. If either of you comes away feeling judged, keep looking.

Bring these to your first conversation. You're both listening for fairness, a clear method, and honesty about what coaching can do.

• How much of your work is with couples?
• How do you keep from taking sides?
• What's your training, and do you follow a particular approach?
• Do you ever see us separately, and what stays confidential?
• What happens between sessions?
• When would you say coaching isn't enough and refer a couple to a therapist?

The last one matters. A good marriage coach knows where coaching ends and will tell you.

You don't need to explain your whole marriage in a first message. Say roughly what's going on and ask how they work. Borrow one of these:

Hi [name], my spouse and I have been married [number] years and lately we're more like housemates than a couple. We'd like help reconnecting. Do you work with couples like us, and what does a first session look like?

Hi [name], we're getting married next year and we'd like to work on how we handle disagreements before we do. Is premarital coaching something you offer, and how would we start?

Swap in your own situation and send it to two or three coaches. Reading the replies together is a good first step in itself.

A marriage coach helps you communicate better, resolve conflict, and rebuild the partnership, starting from where you are today. That's coaching, not therapy. If there's abuse, addiction, or a mental health condition in the picture, a licensed marriage and family therapist is the right first stop. Coaching can sit alongside that care, but it doesn't replace it.

One honest note: a coach can't save a marriage that one partner has already left. What they can do is help two people who both want it to work find their way back to each other.

You're browsing CoachCompare's marriage coach directory. Coaches create their own profiles and choose their own specialties, and everyone on this page lists marriage coaching as one of theirs. Profiles are written by the coaches themselves. The list shows the newest profiles first unless you change the sort, and coaches don't pay for placement in these results.